Meet Ben and Teresa.
They are loving parents to two beautiful children and the founders of Places of Welcome where they foster and create new avenues of welcoming hospitality for those who live in the margins. They have opened their home and hearts to welcoming people from all walks of life. Ben and Teresa are part of a community that facilitates spiritual practices, healing gardens, and the Jesus Kitchen at Rainbow Gatherings throughout the year.
I had the privilege of spending some time with Ben and Teresa at our partner retreat in 2021 and it was evident that they carry something special. You can feel a safe presence, similar to the comfort of home, when in conversation with them. The pure love they share overflows like a steady, calming fountain.
Not only do they carry a message of welcome, but they live it.
⬇️Watch this short video to hear more about them and how they navigate being a couple in ministry⬇️
“We have been together for 15 years… one-year dating and 14 years married. We have been in ministry together for 20 years. Yep, we knew each other for 5 years before we started dating!”
How do you try to bring out each other’s strengths?
We allow one another to have room to shine as we each have different strengths that come out at different times.
And we are good at volleying back and forth in our ministry; taking turns and allowing the other to shine when the situation calls for the others’ gifts and strengths.
How do you approach healthy conflict resolution?
We do this by trying to understand why the other is frustrated or angry. Also by listening to one another and hearing what the other’s needs actually are in the moment.
We also prioritize communicating, being honest with our needs and feelings, hearing and listening to one another, making sure we understand one another and talking about how we can do better moving forward.
When your ministry is struggling, your relationship doesn’t have to. How do you keep a healthy marriage despite the ups and downs in ministry?
We don’t know if we do anything specific but it helps us to identify when struggles are happening and what is causing them. Then we spend the time needed, being intentional to resolve and work through the struggles together.
Spiritual attack is real, especially when you choose a life in ministry. How have you been able to overcome these attacks together?
Prayer, communication, and being honest with one another when things are hard or an attack is happening. It also helps to have friends and community around us for support.
What tips and resources would you recommend for other couples in ministry together?
- Taking breaks…together but also allowing one another to have space to take a break alone.
- Work out of rest.
- Find good babysitters. 🙂 Realize that family comes before ministry and children is a ministry in and of themselves.
- “The Five Love Languages: How to Express Heartfelt Commitment to Your Mate” helped us to better understand the ways in which we give and receive love.
- The Enneagram really helped us understand why each person is doing the things they do.
- “Sacred Pathways: Nine Ways to Connect with God” helped us understand each other and how we connect to God differently.
- We were able to go through marriage counseling as a preventative measure before our second child was born, which was really helpful in gaining an understanding of one another.
This highlight series is for anyone, in or out of the life of ministry! Our hope is that we not only highlight our partners’ ministries but also their marriages. We want to celebrate the humble care and sacrifices that these honorable marriages embody. After this series, we are excited to delve into some stories of what it looks like to pursue ministry individually.
